Take a look. Do u feel anything?
I dont feel anything at all. im gone numb.


Dr. Mengele's "Project" at auschwitz

Vera Alexander was a Jewish inmate at Auschwitz who looked after 50 sets of Romani twins:

“I remember one set of twins in particular: Guido and Ina, aged about four. One day, Mengele took them away. When they returned, they were in a terrible state: they had been sewn together, back to back, like Siamese twins. Their wounds were infected and oozing pus. They screamed day and night. Then their parents – I remember the mother's name was Stella – managed to get some morphine and they killed the children in order to end their suffering.

Unit 731 of Japanese army

Vivisections were performed on prisoners after infecting them with various diseases. Scientists performed invasive surgery on prisoners, removing organs to study the effects of disease on the human body. These were conducted while the patients were alive because it was feared that the decomposition process would affect the results. infected and vivisected prisoners included men, women, children, and infants.

Vivisections were also performed on pregnant women, sometimes impregnated by doctors, and the fetus removed.

Prisoners had limbs amputated in order to study blood loss.

Those limbs that were removed were sometimes re-attached to the opposite sides of the body.

Some prisoners' limbs were frozen and amputated, while others had limbs frozen then thawed to study the effects of the resultant untreated gangrene and rotting.

Some prisoners had their stomachs surgically removed and the esophagus reattached to the intestines

Parts of the brain, lungs, liver, etc. were removed from some prisoners.

Read it all.. ive copied it from wikipedia.. maybe its just a trailor of what might have happened in the past.

if there is God, he is probably thinking of suicide.. hhahhh, what kind of creature he has created.. theres a gun in his hand(man-made!!), pointin towards his own neck, im damn sure bout this. anyway, I dont believe in god.

women were raped, chidrens were crushed, men were killed. women are being raped, childhood is getting crushed and men, they are still getting killed. is this the way it is.. are we supposed to accept it and try to make our own lives beautiful ???? 

by the way, what is in our hand ? jus c things happen around us, shut ur senses, try to forget n be a so called good social animal, wish happy birthdays, drink beers, watch movies, try to fall in love, think bout our future, find a way to make money, indulge in our own selves.

think about a Palestinian boy in a ghetto, barefoot, in cold, trying to raise his lil sister.

where the fuckkk have all the flowers gone??

I see a woman in the night

With a baby in her hand

Under an old street light

Near a garbage can

Now she puts the kid away, and she's gone to get a hit

She hates her life, and what she's done to it

There's one more kid that will never go to school

Never get to fall in love, never get to be cool

- Niel Young

Ive been fighting with this "I" for a long time... how much self obsessed we are with our I.
when we talk, we want them to listen. we hardly listen to them.
when we sit alone, we want someone to come n acknowledge our loneliness.
when someone ignores our I, we go crazy. It hurts.
thers a thin line between pride n ego... n ive been getting tangled, spotting that line for me.
its not a line, its some kinda hypothetical 3D curve, in our shapeless mind.
or is it a complicated confusion im makin for me to get tangled.. huhhh.
or do I like when someone thinks that I am a deep thinker, philosopher who can make himself a spiderweb of thoughts....
shit, its embarassing when I deliberately hurt my own shitty ego.

count, how many times Ive used this word I.
count, how many times u use ur I. out of those 60,000 thoughts, in a single day, rarely a thought is about something which is not related to this I.

I think,
I wish,
I don't,
I know,
I would,
I have,
I hate,
I want,
I like,
I am.

but its really good to clean our closet once in a while.
kill that ego, n fuck those ego boosters, life wll be much more colorful.
I need your "I". I want your "I". I cant live without your "I", even though Im always concerned with my I.
It will be a different world if everyone gives a chance to other's I,
"I guess"

just took a walk through the streets. everybody is happy, at least for some time. kids playing with each other.. laughing.

a rich kid came with his father n bought a lot of crackers, n at the corner of that bent street, i saw another kid holdin hand of his mother, a widow with not much money, looking at that cracker's stall.

n then somethin took hold of my mind.

a boy in our college canteen.. merely of 12 years old. after loosing his father, he left school. came to mumbai from some village. Satyam, yes thats his name. when i talked to him last year, i somehow felt the deepness of his voice, lost innocence. it still drills me.

when i see firecrackers. im unable to see the light n sound they make, i always find myself thinkin bout the tiny hands that made them, n the smoke trail it leaves behind...

Finally they released there ninth studio album.. I was waitin for it for a long time.
n now that ive heard his voice n lyrics, im feeling blessed.

A golden baritone full of emotions. thats all.

we are all confused. fuckin confused about each and everything.
its just a state of mind. its all a state of mind. silence or absence of sound. vaccum or nothing.
brain is jus another piece of shit. u c, the drive comes from the heart. they say u have to be practical.. n what do they mean? that uve gotta control that drive inside.
am i a human being or an animal first?
love, hatred, concern, anger, compassion, ego, sadness, jealousy, fear, peace, guilt, happiness..... list never ends.
like brownian motion. spins around ur head every second. the whole spectrum.
n we've gotta find a path. but to where?
am i still confused? or its just that i love to get confused? fuck.

"all the thoughts, you never see
You are always thinking,
brain is wide, brain is deep
are you sinking?"
-Eddie Vedder